Peer mentoring

That last post got a good response via various channels – specifically peer mentoring so let’s continue the discussion.  Peer mentoring is in my view one of the richest sources of advice, counselling and support that you can get.  Your peers – be they in the same company even same department – will frequently have the ability to open your eyes to very different views.  No matter how objective we think we are, we have biases and preferences – moving away from these is important as it allows you to see the world differently.  Once your view of the world is altered, so are the issues and consequently the potential solutions.

Choice of a peer mentor is slightly different to the more ‘formal’ mentor and selecting peers that are different to you enriches the experience.  They can come from a much wider circle of colleagues or even family - be male / female, younger / same age group / older – same profession / different profession. The key is mutual empathy and trust - which is not on tap but needs time to develop.  With the right peer mentor you can openly discuss specific challenges that you have at any moment with your team or specific members of the team, chances are they have had similar situations.  They are great listeners when you have concerns about the progress of a specific project – you know the type - something is not quite right and you can’t put your finger on it, primarily because you are too close in many cases!  Use them as honest sounding boards for your career ideas. – does the direction make sense, is your current skill set sufficient, what gaps are there – and here very importantly if there are gaps, accept them as gaps and as a learning opportunity.  You hear time and again that females when considering a new position or career direction tend to think they need to be proficient in all the skills whereas our male colleagues have less hesitation going for it with 60-80% of the required skills – girls something to learn here!

Two of my best peer mentors are around my age, one male and one female.  My male peer knows me well as we had worked together for many years and we have a solid basis of trust, respect and empathy.  He is one of the few people from whom I can accept the unadorned truth and this because we shared so many experiences – both positive and negative.  My female peer comes from a very different culture and had transferred from the US to Switzerland. Coming to grips with a new business culture is not always so easy, so having lived in Switzerland for many years, I am able to help her understand specific aspects.  She helps me in that she is a fantastic listener and asks very direct questions so by talking I often realised I have my own solution, just needed to articulate it!  Really good peer mentors can easily become very good friends as the discussions move from work to family – how we raise our kids, realising our dreams and importantly Life Work balance – not everyone wants to be on call 24x7…. So reach out to those selected peers and tap into the depth of experience!